Valium.. Valium.. Valium..
Even the word makes me feel like I have something very wrong with me for taking it.
It's been a month now since I was 'put on' this wonder drug, and yes, it's a wonder drug. It does things to the mind and body that could only be explained as beautifully fucked up.
Never before have I felt so safe while standing still alone in a field, never have I felt so upright when sat down, never before have I felt more loving, more appreciative of my own creations, others creations, creation in general.
Oh but boy am I hooked, and it scares me. It stops me from having these marvelous ideas of space and time, the universe and verse.
Valium is in the category of drugs that slow normal brain function. This is exactly what I think I needed. What a prayed for almost. That the racing thoughts, the overload of conciousness, the silence of juggernauts through steel would come to rest in the ground.
The beauty of the dark, is the beauty of no light.
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